Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 16, 2013 11:18:01 GMT -8
"Tell my wife I love her, and tell the goats I loved them more."
You have been convicted of saying something horribly offensive on JvS, and the Whills are going to execute you via black hole.
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The Major
Member
Also known as Sailor Titan
Posts: 5,959 
Affiliation: Fallanassi
Traffic Light: Blue
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Last Words
Nov 16, 2013 11:53:53 GMT -8
via mobile
Post by The Major on Nov 16, 2013 11:53:53 GMT -8
Guys, from the bottom of my heart, eat a dick."
You are John Marston.
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Xeonon Solomon
The First Order
Posts: 2,206 
Affiliation: First Order
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Post by Xeonon Solomon on Nov 16, 2013 14:52:05 GMT -8
I would rather be in the year 2552
You are a time traveler, and you decide to go into the mid Cretaceous period. While going through the dense jungle you hear it in the distance in front of you. A chicken bawking. Not thinking about it you continue on and hear it a second time, this time nearer on your left. Looking over you see it. A red hen, however it is 6 feet tall. The talons on its feet sharp as knives and almost a feet long, and its beak filled with teeth. Thats when it attacks, not from the left but behind from the chickensaurus you didn't even know was there.
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Lord Sinistra
Retired High Councilor 
VE Human Capital Management & Talent Acquisition
Posts: 1,474
Affiliation: The Vegemite Enclave
Traffic Light: Green
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Post by Lord Sinistra on Nov 16, 2013 15:31:22 GMT -8
"Figures, I always hated chickens."
You've had a stroke are paralyzed on your floor for several days and about to be eaten by your pets.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 16, 2013 15:49:12 GMT -8
"Fluffy, you bastard. I should have known."
Your soup contains a deadly neurotoxin. You have ten seconds to live.
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Lord Sinistra
Retired High Councilor
VE Human Capital Management & Talent Acquisition
Posts: 1,474
Affiliation: The Vegemite Enclave
Traffic Light: Green
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Post by Lord Sinistra on Nov 16, 2013 15:55:02 GMT -8
"I knew I should have ordered the special."
You're out hunting and stumble into a pair of grizzly cubs and their very pissed off mama bear.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 16, 2013 16:02:39 GMT -8
"FUCK bow season."
A piano is falling, and you are underneath it. Due to extraordinarily bad luck, you've stepped in a puddle of superglue.
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The Major
Member
Also known as Sailor Titan
Posts: 5,959
Affiliation: Fallanassi
Traffic Light: Blue
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Last Words
Nov 16, 2013 18:25:28 GMT -8
via mobile
Post by The Major on Nov 16, 2013 18:25:28 GMT -8
"At least I go out on a great note. HAHAHAHAH---"
You are driving on the lonesome road when your car lights on fire, and the engine is about to explode in five seconds.
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Xeonon Solomon
The First Order
Posts: 2,206
Affiliation: First Order
Traffic Light: Blue
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Post by Xeonon Solomon on Nov 16, 2013 18:27:45 GMT -8
I KNEW I should have paid more attention to thatcookie from the Chinese restaurant
You have just escaped Moria and are being chased by goblins on wargs. You are not part of Thorins company
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 16, 2013 18:32:45 GMT -8
"I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I took an arrow to the throat."
You are a cop in a Need for Speed game, and the player is barreling down on your roadblock at a significant portion of the speed of sound.
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Xeonon Solomon
The First Order
Posts: 2,206
Affiliation: First Order
Traffic Light: Blue
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Post by Xeonon Solomon on Nov 16, 2013 18:50:20 GMT -8
These guys sure are driving fast, *looks at fellow cop* and furious
You are about to go fifteen rounds with the Russian from Rocky and you dont have the champs fortitude.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 16, 2013 19:03:32 GMT -8
"Cerebrospinal fluid tastes funny."
You have just lost in Mortal Kombat. Cue fatality in 3...2...1...
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The Major
Member
Also known as Sailor Titan
Posts: 5,959
Affiliation: Fallanassi
Traffic Light: Blue
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Last Words
Nov 16, 2013 20:25:59 GMT -8
via mobile
Post by The Major on Nov 16, 2013 20:25:59 GMT -8
"Thank goodness I'll come back on the character selection screen since its Mortal Kombat. Hey.... Are we immortal?"
You've been cast into Silent Hill, and are unfortunately being dragged under Toluca Lake by a squidgirldogdick rape pusspimple. Once last breath of air as you kick your last kick, and then you say:
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Post by Saness Colta on Nov 19, 2013 8:08:08 GMT -8
"Like a bossssss!"
Your angry girlfriend (yes, girlfriend, even if you're female), convinced that you cheated on her, has master-engineered a foul death contraption. You are about to be fed into this contraption, which will, in no particular order, disembowel you, catheterize you, colonoscope you, give you a full-body wax, pull finger and toe nails, tickle you until you shit yourself, spray you with lemon juice, wipe your ass with a steel-wire-bristle brush, feed you through an oven set to 150ยบ (just hot enough to be really uncomfortable), give you really aggressive handjobs (even if you're female) with sandpapered hands, break your knees, and finally kill you by asphyxiation. You can see all of these torments before you are even put into the contraption. Nothing is concealed from you.
What say you?
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Lord Sinistra
Retired High Councilor
VE Human Capital Management & Talent Acquisition
Posts: 1,474
Affiliation: The Vegemite Enclave
Traffic Light: Green
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Post by Lord Sinistra on Nov 19, 2013 8:11:34 GMT -8
"You had time to build this but you couldn't do the dishes? This is why I was out with Karen."
You are highly allergic to peanuts and just felt one crunch between your teeth in a bite of the most delicious thing you have ever tasted.
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Atton Kaelan
Crew of the Wayward Son
You're not allowed to name the star destroyer after your junk, Adi.
Posts: 265
Traffic Light: Green
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Post by Atton Kaelan on Nov 19, 2013 8:19:19 GMT -8
"Well...looks like..."*dons sunglasses*"...I'm about to go...nuts.."
YEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHH
You're playing Skyrim and Alduin suddenly jumps out of the TV screen and into the backyard. He's gonna eat your soul.
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Post by Mack Revette on Nov 19, 2013 13:28:16 GMT -8
*wordless hysterical laughter, being a soulless ginger*
-
It gon' rain, and you gon' drown.
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Ashrah
The Mandalorian Assembly
Posts: 329
Affiliation: Mandalorians
Traffic Light: Blue
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Post by Ashrah on Nov 19, 2013 13:52:41 GMT -8
"Here, hold my shoes"
You've tripped and fallen down a steep embankment. At the bottom is Major with a shit eating grin on her face. Incidentally, you are the shit
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Nov 19, 2013 13:56:38 GMT -8
"This wasn't quite what I meant when I said we needed to try new things."
Your comrades have valiantly pushed you onto a hand grenade so that they may be spared.
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Ashrah
The Mandalorian Assembly
Posts: 329
Affiliation: Mandalorians
Traffic Light: Blue
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Post by Ashrah on Nov 19, 2013 13:57:31 GMT -8
"Catch"
You are choking to death on Fish Taco.
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